Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Up in the Air

Sky-High Anxiety.
When you have anxiety, not knowing what is going to happen can feel the same as knowing something bad is going to happen.

I'm the best at assuming the worst.

Right now, I'm dealing with a lot of uncertainty.  I was waiting on job news that I originally hoped to learn by the end of May... then the end of June... and now have discovered I may not learn until August.

I want to be able to feel secure and plan, but I can't.  At this point, things are out of my hands.  Everything is out of my control... let the chips fall as they may.

I have to learn how to live with the unknown.  The truth is that nothing is certain in this life.  Even when you feel certain, you don't really know.  Certainty is a beautiful illusion.

Yesterday, the anxiety of not knowing really got to me.  I had a total freakout... crying, sobbing, wanting to give up.  My triumph for today was getting up and going to work.  Bad days happen during high stress times, but life keeps moving and you have to keep moving too. 

6 comments:

  1. Living with the unknown is never easy -- and really, it is never-ending, for once we think it's all set, boom. You're right about having to learn to live with it. My personal motto is "fully expect the universe to cooperate." It doesn't always seem like it is doing that, but in the end, it seems to have worked out after all.

    Freak out when you need to. Then do as you did -- get up, go to work, and keep on keeping on!

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    1. Thanks! I really need to work on expecting the universe to cooperate instead of expecting the sky to fall. :-P

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  2. Hang in there. Toes crossed for the job (fingers firmly on the keyboard:)
    Hugs

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    1. Thanks so much! I need all the good vibes I can get!

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  3. Good morning, Laura. You are so right. And none of us never really learn this wisdom until we have to struggle with it on our own terms. Nothing is certain except for one thing: LOVE. Give it away, cultivate it, shape it, put a face on it. You will change lives, you will change you. THAT is for certain. Thank you kindly for visiting my blog! Anita

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    1. Very true! I'm trying to keep my head up!

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